Dear Shrey,
Its been two years since you left us and
it is still so hard to accept. Your absence or should I say your presence is so
conspicuous in our lives…whenever I remember the past, I think if so and so
event happened before Shrey left us or after Shrey left us…none of us is the
same now…a part of all of us left with you. I miss you and I also miss the old
us.
I
am writing today because I just wanted to talk to you -
- I often try to relive the last visit
of yours to our house as much as I can...there are some moments that are I
remember and have been etched in my memory. Like you standing outside the
airport and not wearing anything very warm and me thinking that you didn't get
a jacket as it was really cold.
- Then there were so many other moments
that I lived with you during that time but I don’t remember because I must have
been busy and I must have gone by those moments without actually feeling those
moments and now I regret because I want to feel those moments again... It is a
lesson that I have learnt that we have live and feel each moment even the busy
moments.
- Another time I remember is our trip to
sector 17, me talking to you about something and the way you looked at me with
your big eyes and feeling awkward but at the same time getting the gest of what
I was saying.
- you always made Bambi feel so special
..you were just like a real brother to Bambi and he so looked upto you...I miss
your influence on Bambi...I miss your calls and random messages that you sent
to him. You know, bambi listens to these hardcore Punjabi music these days…he
really enjoys the beats…but probably doesn’t understand the male chauvinistic
nature of the lyrics of these songs. I wonder if you would have given him
company listening to these songs.
- I remember the last hug and seeing you
off outside the house and I always think that i should have gone to drop you at
the airport...don't remember what I was busy with but I missed an opportunity
to create a few more memories and life didn't give me another chance.
- I loved your book and I am sure you
would have also been proud of it.
- I believe Raga is still processing
your loss…Initial years she was too busy missing her old life and the old Zina
and the old Bijoy to actually feel your absence and now she is feeling it more,
I guess. But she is such a brave girl and I am sure she will come out stronger
and kinder.
- I miss you and I miss us.
Love,
Massi
